Andy Rooney Quotes

“If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.”

“The best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.”

“Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.”

“Opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.”

“It’s paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn’t appeal to anyone.”

“Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.”

“A smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.”

“The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort—the opening, terror.”

“Nothing in fine print is ever good news.”

“When you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.”

“Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.”

“Age is nothing but experience, and some of us are more experienced than others.”

“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”

“Vegetarian is an old Indian word meaning ‘lousy hunter.'”

“For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.”

“The kind of humor I like is the thing that makes me laugh for five seconds and think for ten minutes.”

“We’re all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don’t make any big ones.”

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

“I’ve learned… that being kind is more important than being right.”

“Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don’t need to be done.”

“Nothing in life is so hard that you can’t make it easier by the way you take it.”

“The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.”

“The most satisfying thing in life is to have been able to give a large part of oneself to others.”

“If dogs could talk, perhaps we’d find it just as hard to get along with them as we do with people.”

“All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were.”

“One of the best things about books is that they allow you to open up to other people’s experiences.”

“I didn’t get old on purpose, it just happened. If you’re lucky, it could happen to you.”

“We are all better off knowing more about the way we live, no matter how unpleasant it may be.”

“Writers will happen in the best of families.”

“The silver lining of every cloud is that we often come to see our mistakes as blessings.”

“I’ve learned… that the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.”

“Being an optimist after you’ve got everything you want doesn’t count.”

“Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs.”

“If you’re not confused, you’re not paying attention.”

“The 21st century is a wonderful time to be alive. So many ways to amuse ourselves, to be useful, to be informed.”

“The answer to most of life’s big questions is to keep moving forward.”

“People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.”

“It’s funny how much time we spend waiting for something to happen.”

“We’ve learned how to add years to life, but not how to add life to years.”

“Honesty is the key to a good life, but no one said it was easy.”

“A lot of people don’t do well simply because they don’t realize their full potential.”

“Sometimes when we’re generous in small ways, it can change someone else’s life.”

“What makes old age so sad is not that our joys but our hopes cease.”

“When people say nothing is impossible, I tell them to try nailing Jell-O to a wall.”

“There’s something about the aging process that makes you appreciate all the little things.”

“The real trick is to enjoy life in all the moments in between the big ones.”

“We spend too much time worrying about what other people think and not enough time being true to ourselves.”

“The key to a happy life is not to worry about what you can’t control.”

“The happiest people are those who can laugh at themselves.”

“Kindness, in the end, is all that really matters.”

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